We are not defined by our rejections….or rather we shouldn’t be. Nobody knows about them . . . or should. We ought to be defined by our efforts and success. Don’t talk too much about rejection, or about trying hard and not getting anywhere.

Yet many people want to talk about how hard they’ve tried, how the process isn’t fair (like anything is supposed to be fair). how many rejections they’ve achieved, or how many years they’ve invested into a manuscript that doesn’t seem to go anywhere.

Nobody wants to hear any of that. Except maybe others who want to fuss about not making it. Is that the energy you want to surround yourself with?

When you live in a world where you define yourself by rejection, wasted hours invested, and an inability to make it, you become that person. You don’t live for success. You wait for failure to happen, to appear around every corner.

Decide which you want, success or failure, positive or negative, and live it, strive for it, aspire to it.

But to make excuses, to fuss about the unfairness of it all, to criticize Amazon and all the booksellers out there, to claim agents only sign up people who are connected, to agonize about one-star reviews or complain about people who do not appreciate how many hours you spent at the keyboard, well, you might as well quit now. And honestly, by posting that stuff online, you are leaving a lasting imprint of failure that may come back to bite you. You paint yourself as a negative person.

Talk success. Talk positive. Assuming you talk at all. Always be moving toward doing well, not wasting energy to fuss. Quietly pursue your best. Why do anything but?