We all want to write that perfect script. One that will blow the reader’s mind and convince a producer to shovel copious amounts of money into our creation (but only once the strike finishes, of course). Unfortunately, this is much easier said than done, as the majority of screenplays fall well short of perfection.
I’ve spent the last year pouring through scripts of all kinds like my life depends on it (it does actually); new ones and classics. You name a type of script, I’ve read it twice. Therefore, I’ve decided to lay out the three biggest issues that newcomers tend to make when trying to crack into the industry as I see it.
Confusing Screenwriting with Prose Writing:
Novelists have always resented screenwriters because we seem to have less work to do. As you know, your screenplay is not written to make the New York Times Bestseller list; instead, it exists as a manual of sorts for filmmakers and their crew to breathe life into.
Since pages from a screenplay generally have much more white space than those from our counterparts, you’d think that we screenwriters would revel in this fact; however, some still seem unaware that they are free from such a burden and continue to write unnecessary information.
A screenplay is only read by those in the industry. Audiences don’t get to or want to read what you’ve written. They pay to see it visualized. So don’t include tons of information that won’t be directly presented to them.
For example, a script I read a few months back mentioned details about the dynamic between the protagonist and a character who only appears in one scene. The script stated that the latter bullied the main character during their childhood years; however, this wasn’t apparent without the discretion on the page. Therefore, viewers wouldn’t have any idea about their history unless you show it on screen. If not shown, leave it out.
Saying The Quiet Part Out Loud:
It’s a genuine skill to weave subtext into your work. Unfortunately, it’s a skill that some struggle putting into practice.
This lack of ability usually manifests itself in the characters literally discussing the subtext aloud, making for less than compelling drama.
Let’s say your script is about overcoming depression. A relevant topic for sure, but how do you make it work as a story? The lazy way is to include scenes where characters sit around discussing depression and its effects on their lives.
As an alternative, you could show that your protagonist battles depression by including scenes where the depression is visually displayed. (Show don’t tell.)
For instance, in the movie You Were Never Really Here we are exposed to the protagonist’s mental health issues through his behavior; we see him engaging in risky behavior such as leaning forward at a railway station as a train approaches.
Clunky Exposition:
The bane of a writer’s life is exposition, but, you can incorporate it into your script without it seeming forced or obvious. An effective manner is to inject conflict between characters in scenes that are overly expository, rather than having them plainly explaining the plot. This will help you to gradually trickle information to the audience without making your scene flat and uninspiring.
A movie that brilliantly handles exposition is David Fincher’s The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. The story revolves around a journalist hired to investigate the mysterious disappearance of a teenage girl. When the background of the case is explained to Blomkvist (the journalist), by Harriet’s uncle, the scene’s expository nature is disguised by the latter explaining his dislike for all of the suspects in the case.
Here’s a video that goes in-depth on the scene:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNyJGHDKBng
Hopefully, your writing will benefit after following the advice given. All I ask in return is that you give me a shout-out in your Oscar acceptance speech.
Bio: Tom Byrne is a script reader/editor based in Ireland. Since receiving a Diploma in Film and Television Production he works as a freelancer, his website being, Page 1 Screen Services (https://www.page1screenservices.com). He possesses a strong interest in publishing his own writing online, both on his blog and on Medium, and is keen to gain as much experience as possible.
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